The Basement
by Kong Food Kid
Summary: Can you ever really trust anyone? Enter "The Basement" and leave forever changed!
1. Chapter 1

The Basement Chapter 1

Eric walks about Point Place. He is in a car. He is pulling into the Forman driveway.

Then Eric enters the basement of the Forman home

Eric: Hi babe! I have something for you.

Donna: What is it?

Eric: Just a little something.

He playfully hides the package, then presents it to Donna. She opens it to find a red dress.

Donna: Eric, it's beautiful. Thank you. Can I try it on now?

Eric: Sure, it's yours.

Donna: Wait right here. (she grabs Eric's shirt and kisses him) I'll try it on right now.

Eric sits down. Cut to Donna reemerging from the stairs in the red dress.

Eric: Wow, you look so sexy, Donna.

Donna: Isn't it fabulous?

Eric: I would do anything for my girl.

Enter Fez

Fez: Oh hey, guys.

Eric: Oh hi, Fez.

Fez: Wow! Look at you!

Donna: It's from Eric.

Eric: Anything for my princess! Ha-ha-ha-ha.

Fez: How much was it?

Donna: Fez, don't ask a question like that!

Eric: Nice to see you, Fez. I'm going to take a nap.

Fez: Can I go upstairs too?

Eric: Ha-ha!

Donna: Fez, I think I'm gonna join him.

Eric: A-ha-ha.

They exit upstairs, speaking barely audibly

Donna: I've got some candles upstairs.

Eric: You always think. A-ha-ha. Alright, I'm ready.

Donna: This is so pretty, I can't wait for you to get it off of me.

Eric: Oh, yeahhh.

Fez takes a bite of an apple, then follows them upstairs.

In the bedroom, Eric and Donna start a pillow fight.

Eric: A-ha-ha! Ha-ha-ha! Ouch!

Fez joins in and gets clobbered as everyone laughs.

Fez: No, stop!

Eric: Fez, do you have something else to do?

Fez: I just like to watch you guys.

Donna: Oh, Fez, Fez, Fez boy!

Eric: Fez, two's great, but three's a crowd, ha-ha.

Fez: I get it. You guys want to be alone.

Eric: That's the idea!

Fez: Fine. I have homework to do anyway. Bye, lovebirds!

Eric: Bye, Fez.

Donna: Bye, Fez.

Eric and Donna make love.

I can't explain

 _Why I feel this way about you_  
 _It'd be a shame_  
 _Living in this world without you_

 _There's nothing_  
 _I wouldn't do for you_  
 _You are my fantasy_  
 _Dream come true_

 _When I see your face_  
 _It stirs up my emotions_  
 _Your style and grace_  
 _It inspires my devotion_

 _... and_

 _I will stand in the way of a bullet_  
 _I will run through a forest of flames_  
 _I will climb the highest of mountains_  
 _Just to show you I love you I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

 _I will_

Donna seems bored with Eric as he sleeps.

The alarm clock goes off at :28. Eric gets up, smells a rose, and walks back naked. He emerges from the bathroom dressed for work and greets Donna.

Eric: Did you like last night?

Donna: Yes I did.

Eric: Ha-ha-ha.

Donna: Can I get you anything?

Eric: Unh-unh. I have to go now.

Donna: Okay, bye.

Eric: Bye.

Eric exits. Cut to an exterior daytime shot of the house, then to the living room. Donna answers the door, and Midge enters.

Donna: Hi mom, how are you?

Midge: I'm fine, how are you? Hmmm? Okay, let's go to the couch, and we will sit down. Now, what's happening with you? Hmmm?

Donna: Nothing much. Do you want some coffee?

Midge: What's wrong? Tell me.

Donna: I'm not feeling good today.

Midge: Well, why not?

Donna: I don't love him anymore.

Midge: Why don't you love him anymore? Tell me.

Donna: He's so boring.

Midge: You've known him for over five years. You're engaged. You said you loved him. He supports you, he provides for you, and darling, you can't support yourself. He's a wonderful man, and he loves you very much. And his position is very secure. And he told me he plans to buy you a house.

Donna: That's why he's so boring!

Midge: Well, what are you going to do?

Donna: I don't know. I don't mind living with him.

Midge: Well, you can't do that. Have you talked to him about it?

Donna: No. I don't know what to do.

Midge: Well, he's a wonderful person. And he's getting a promotion very soon. Now he bought you a car, he bought you a ring, clothes, whatever you wanted, and now you want to dump him. That's not right. I've always thought of him as my son-in-law. You should marry Eric, he would be good for you.

Donna: I guess you're right about that.

Midge: Well, of course I'm right. I know men! I wasn't born yesterday. I'm glad you're listening to your mother. Nobody else listens to me.

Donna: You're probably right about that, mom.

Midge: Well, I'm glad you're listening to your mother. Listen, I've gotta go. But you remember what I told you, okay? M-hm. Bye bye now.

Midge exits

Donna: (sarcastically) Thanks, mom.

The same room, later in the day. Donna picks up the phone and Hyde answers on the other end.

Hyde: Hello?

Donna: Hey baby, how are you doing?

Hyde: Oh hey, how you doing? Yeah, I'm very busy, what's going on?

Donna: I just finished talking to my mom. She gave me this big lecture about Eric.

Hyde: Look, we'll talk about it later. I told you, I'm very busy.

Donna: We'll talk about it now! Whenever you say we'll talk about it later, we never do. I can't wait till later. I want to talk right now. You owe me one anyway.

Hyde: Okay. Alright, what do you want to talk about?

Donna: She's a stupid bitch. She wants to control my life. I'm not going to put up with that. I'm going to do what I want to do, and that's it. What do you think I should do?

Hyde: I mean, why do you ask me? You know, you've been very happy with Eric. What do you want me to say? I mean, you should enjoy your life. What's the problem?

Donna: Maybe, you're right. Can I see you tomorrow?

Hyde: Okay. Alright, how about noon?

Donna: I'll be waiting for you. Bye.

Hyde: Alright, see you.


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Back in the basement, Donna answers the door. Hyde enters.

Hyde: Hi. How you doing?

Donna: I'm fine, come in. Have a seat. (they are silent while she pours wine and offers it)

Hyde: Thank you.

Donna: It's hot in here. (she unbuttons the top of her blouse) Do you mind?

Hyde: No.

Donna approaches Hyde in her strapless black dress.

Hyde: I mean the candles, the music, the sexy dress, I mean, what's going on here?

Donna: I like you very much, loverboy.

Hyde: What are you doing this for?

Donna: What's the matter? Don't you like me? I'm your girl?

Hyde: Eric s my best friend. You re going to be married next month. Come on.

Donna: Forget about Eric. This is between you and me.

Hyde: I don t think so. I m leaving now.

Donna: Please don't leave. Please don't leave. I need you. I love you. I don't want to get married anymore. I don't love Eric. I dream about you. I need you to make love to me.

Hyde: I don't think so. Everything s going to be fine, I promise.

They proceed to kiss, then have fully clothed three-minute sex on the spiral stairs.

 _Your touch_

 _Pullin' fire out of me_

 _Your touch_

 _Like the wind crashing on the sea_

 _Your kiss_

 _As gentle as a summer breeze_

 _Your love_

 _Is what I need to set me free_

 _A rose is what you are to me_

 _The smell of wonders oh so sweet_

 _You are a rose to me_

 _You are my rose baby_

 _You are a rose to me_

 _You are my rose baby_

 _You are my rose_

 _You are my rose_

 _You are my rose_

 _You are my rose_

 _You are my rose_

Hyde: Why did you do this to me? Why? Eric's my best friend.

Donna: Didn't you enjoy it?

Hyde: That's not the point.

Donna: I love you, Hyde.

Hyde: Look, you're very attractive, alright? You re beautiful. But we can't do this anymore. I can't hurt Eric.

Donna: I know. He's your best friend.

Hyde: Hey. This will be our secret.

They kiss.


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

Eric's car pulls up to a flower shop.

Eric enters the flower shop.

Eric: Hi.

Florist: Can I help you?

Eric: (removing sunglasses) Yeah, can I have a dozen red roses, please?

Florist: Oh hi, Eric, I didn t know it was you. Here you go.

Eric: That's me! How much is it?

Florist: It'll be eighteen dollars.

Eric: Here you go, keep the change. Hi doggy!

Florist: You're my favorite customer.

Eric: Thanks a lot, bye!

Florist: Bye bye!

Eric exits with the roses and gets in his car.

Cut to Donna in the room, talking on the phone.

Donna: Yeah, delivery. 555-4828. Half Canadian bacon with pineapple, half artichoke with pesto and light on the cheese. Thanks.

She hangs up, and the doorbell rings.

Donna: Who is it?

Fez: Fez!

Donna: Hey Fez, how are you doing?

Fez: I'm fine. What's new?

Donna: Actually I m really busy. Do you want something to drink?

Fez: No thanks. I just want to talk to Eric. You look beautiful today. Can I kiss you?

Donna: You are such a little brat!

Fez: I'm just kidding! I love you and Eric.

Donna: Okay, okay. Eric's going to be here any minute. You can wait if you want.

Fez: I gotta go. You'll tell him I stopped by.

Donna: Of course.

Fez: Bye.

Donna: Bye, Fez.

Fez exits.

Eric's car pulls up.

Eric enters the basement.

Eric: Hi babe. These are for you. (he presents a bouquet of roses)

Donna: Thanks honey, they're beautiful. Did you get your promotion?

Eric: Nah.

Donna: You didn't get it, did you?

Eric: That son of a bitch told me that I would get it within three months. I save them bundles. They're crazy. I don't think I will ever get it. They betray me, they didn't keep their promise, they tricked me, and I don't care anymore.

Donna: Did you tell them how much you save them?

Eric: Of course, what do you think? They already put my ideas into practice. The Price Mart saves money, and they are using me, and I am the fool.

Donna: I still love you.

Eric: You're the only one who does.

Donna: At least you have friends. I didn't get any calls today. You're right. The computer business is too competitive. Do you want me to order a pizza?

Eric: Whatever, I don't care.

Donna: I already ordered a pizza.

Eric: You think about everything, ha-ha.

Donna: What's the matter? Are you alright? It s just a lousy promotion. You know what you need? You need a drink.

Eric: I don't drink, you know that!

Donna goes to the kitchen and emerges from the kitchen with scotch and vodka.

Eric: Ha-ha-ha-ha.

She mixes them to form scotchka.

Donna: Don't worry about it. It's good for you.

Eric: You must be crazy. I cannot drink this.

Donna: If you love me, you'll drink this.

She raises his glass to his mouth and he drinks.

Eric: You're right, it tastes good. A-ha.

Donna: I know. I am right. Don't worry about those fuckers. You're a good man. Drink and let's have some fun.

They drink. Cut to later, when they have had quite a bit to drink and Donna is now wearing Eric's tie as a headband.

Eric: Ha-ha-ha. A-ha-ha-ha. Mmm.

Donna laughs hysterically. Eric drops and shatters a glass.

Eric: You have nice legs, Donna. Ha-ha.

Donna: (laughing) You have nice pecs.

Eric: A-ha-ha. I am tired, I'm wasted, I love you darling!

Donna: Come on, make love to me.

Eric: Unhhh

Donna: Come on, you owe me one.

Eric: I love you, Donna.

Donna: I love you, Eric. (she rips open his shirt)

They make out on the couch.


	4. Chapter 4

The Basement Chapter 4

Donna: So I m organizing the party for Eric s birthday. Can you come?

Midge: When is it?

Donna: Next Friday at six. It s a surprise.

Midge: Oh.

Donna: You can bring someone if you want.

Midge: Well, sure, I can come. But I don t know if I ll bring anybody. Oh! That jerk Bob. He wants me to give him a share of my house. That house belongs to me. He has no right. I m not giving him a penny. Who does he think he is?

Donna: He s your husband my father!

Midge: He s always bugging me about my house. Fifteen years ago, we agreed, that house belongs to me. Now the value of the house is going up and he s seeing dollar signs. Everything goes wrong at once. Nobody wants to help me, and I m dying.

Donna: You re not dying, mom.

Midge: I got the results of the test back. I definitely have breast cancer.

Donna: Look, don t worry about it. Everything will be fine. They re curing lots of people every day.

Midge: I m sure I ll be alright. Oh! I heard Edward is talking about me. He is a hateful man. Oh, I m so glad I divorced him.

Donna: Don t worry about it. You just concentrate on getting well.

Midge: Well at least you have a good man.

Donna: You re wrong! Mom, he s not what you think he is. He didn t get his promotion. And he got drunk last night. And he hit me.

Midge: Eric doesn t drink! What are you talking about?

Donna: He did last night. And I don t love him anymore.

Midge: Eric is your financial security. You can t afford to ignore this.

Donna: Yeah, okay mom. Can I just talk to you later?

Midge: You don t want to talk to me.

Donna: I just got done talking with a client, and I have to get ready to meet him. Can I just talk to you later?

Midge: Okay. I will see you later. Bye bye.

Midge exits. Cut to an exterior shot of the house.

Cut to the room. Jackie and Kelso enter, nervously.

Jackie: How much time do we have?

Kelso: I dunno, uh, a couple hours? At least.

Jackie: Well, let s have some fun.

They sit on the couch and Kelso opens a box of chocolates.

Kelso: Did you, uh, know, that chocolate is the symbol of love?

Jackie: (laughing) Feed me.

Kelso puts a chocolate in Jackie s mouth and then makes out with her. He puts a chocolate on her chest and eats it off of her.

Jackie: Yum!

Kelso: It s delicious!

Jackie: Arms up! (she takes off Kelso s shirt) Chocolate is a symbol of love.

Jackie places a chocolate in Kelso s mouth and then makes out with him. She starts to go down on him, although he begins reacting with comically exaggerated orgasm faces before she s in position to do anything.

Cut to an exterior shot of the painted ladies.

Cut to the room, where Kelso and Jackie are startled by Donna and Midge entering.

Midge: Hello? What are these characters doing here?

Donna: They like to come here to do their homework.

Midge: What homework?

Donna: Mom, this is Jackie s boyfriend Kelso. Kelso, this is my mother.

Kelso: It s a pleasure to meet you.

Midge: Mm.

Jackie: Uh-huh.

Kelso and Jackie exit.

Midge: Unh. Oh, all that shopping wore me out.

Fez enters.

Fez: Hi Donna.

Donna: Hey Fez. Fez, this is my mom. Mom, this is Fez.

Midge: How many people come in and out of this apartment every day? This is worse than Grand Central Station!

Fez: I just need to borrow some sugar.

Donna: Help yourself, Fez.

Fez: I also need a cup of flour and half a stick of butter.

Midge: Doesn t your home have a kitchen?

Fez: I ll come back later.

Fez exits.

Midge: Tell me, what does Fez do?

Donna: Eric wanted to get his parents to adopt Fez. It s really a tragedy how many kids out there don t have parents. When Fez turned eighteen, Eric wants him to move into the basement and he s paying for it until he graduates from school. Eric really loves Fez even though he doesn t say it much. He s like a brother figure to him. I told you, mom, Eric is very caring about the people in his life. And he gave Fez his own set of keys to our place.

Midge: Please, don t hurt Eric. Now if you really don t love him, so be it, but you should tell him.

Kelso enters.

Kelso: I forgot my, uh, book.

He grabs a book but somehow this leads to Midge holding his underwear.

Midge: What s this?

Everyone laughs.

Kelso: That s nothing!

Kelso takes the underwear and exits as everyone continues to laugh.

Midge: Homework!

Donna: (laughing) Don t worry about it.

Midge: If I were a burglar, you would be my best friend.

Donna: Look, I don t want to talk about it.

Midge: You know I worry about you. I have to go home.

Donna: Okay, mom.

Midge: Bye bye.

Midge exits.

Donna: (sighing) Oh my god. 


End file.
